Happy spooky season, everyone!
The monsters of corporate commerce would have you believe that you are nobody until someone loves you … or is willing to support you as 1/2 of a couple’s suit, Sandy to your Danny, spaghetti for your meatballs, Keni for your Barbie and loofah in your soap.
We here at The Post blow a kiss in protest.
If you’re in the market for a lifetime of love and loyalty, then get yourself a fur baby—preferably a rescue, and definitely the kind that will let you subject them to the indignity of a zodiac suit.
From pet costumes for large to small dogs, fun to scary, we’ve got you covered.
Here’s to dogs we don’t deserve and the most wonderful time of the year. Read on to discover the best and cutest Halloween costumes for dog and owner. While you’re here, be sure to read our guide to the dog breed that matches your zodiac sign and the best costumes for your pets.
Barista and Frappuccino
Aries prefer life in the fast lane and their caffeine high.
Many astrologers place the sacred coffee bean itself in the area of the red planet Mars, the ruling luminary of Aries. One of a kind, this suit gives a double look of a cool f-king.
Find your dog’s coffee suit here.
IBS, Impatience, and Rapid Dissolving Fury sold separately.
Beanie Baby and Beanie Boo
As the first earth sign in the zodiac, Taurus is very close to their inner animal and very much into any Halloween costume that prioritizes comfort and warmth. This outfit, basically a plush comforter dressed as a jumpsuit, gets the job done. Adults can be purchased here, and lion mane for dogs is available here.
The angel and the devil
Symbolized by the trash-talking, god-defying twins Castor and Pollux, Gemini represents the fundamental duality present in all things and all people: good and evil, dark and light, bark and bite, horn and halo. Honor the divinity of these divisions with a devil/angel duo costume.
Horns here, halos there.
Daenerys Targaryen and her dragon offspring
Ruled by the moon, Cancer represents the mother archetype and there has never been a fiercer female than the mother of dragons herself, HRH Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen, First of Her Name, Queen of the Andals and First Men, Protector of Seven Kingdoms, Unburnt, Breaker of Chains.
Find the recipe for this royalty with this DIY no-sew tutorial from Just a Tina Bit.
Pennywise and Georgia
Leo rules the fifth house of pleasure and play; colloquially known as the “house of fun”, it is the natural domain of laughter, clowns and other theatrics. Long on brow, short on subtlety and a pervert of the game, Pennywise, as previously established is a card-carrying member of the lion pride.
Big cats and their little dogs can find raincoats here and Pennywise inspo here.
Pope / Nun
All hail the holy fairy. Rulers of the sixth house of daily service and devout believers in the adage that cleanliness is next to godliness, the dirty minds and spotless floors of the likes of Virgo will find costume glory in this papal puppy and hot nun combination .
The Pope’s robe is available here, and the nun’s habit can be found here.
Basic witches
Libra is ruled by Venus, and by default, Libra people are motivated by the beautiful and the pleasant. This commitment to likability and ease sometimes translates into a bad case of basic b–ch.
Whether you dress up ironically or because it’s your everyday uniform (#PumpkinSpice4Life) the basic set of pregnant witches is for you.
Guide dog is not required but highly recommended.
Wednesday and Pugsley Addams
As previously proven, Wednesday Addams, with her preference for the esoteric and fiery side eye is a quintessential Scorpio.
As a sign of ultimate power and ulterior motives, every straight-faced protagonist needs an accomplice. In this suit, a Pugsley the dog (no pedigree required) provides the perfect compliment to this tailed powerhouse.
Find the Pugsley sweater for your dog here.
Where’s Waldo?
Sagittarius is the sign of the seeker, and this Where’s Waldo dog/people rising compliments the free-wheeling, ever-roaming, ghost-prone spirit of the archer.
The glasses make you look smart and the dog suggests you’re more dedicated than previously thought possible, a win-win. A similar suit can be found here.
Bad cop and dog
Capricorn is ruled by harsh Saturn, the planet of limitations, straight lines and hard knocks. This lord gives the native a real daddy/guardian/correctional officer energy.
Sea goats can feel their mark and indulge their love of uniforms with this dog couple costume. Find prison stripes for your dog here and cop costume accessories for you here.
ET & Elliott
Aquarius is the sign of all that falls beyond: space travel, electricity and extraterrestrials. Consequently, natives often feel disconnected or disconnected from the land itself. Water Bearers can honor their eccentricity and dream of flight with this easy DIY costume that features them as the kind kid Elliot and their dog as the sparkly, ball-throwing, planet-flying, sentient being that is ET .
Astrology 101: Your Guide to the Star
Mr. Stay Puft and the Ghostbuster
Ruled by Neptune, the planet of dreams and the unconscious mind, Pisces is the sign most associated with psychic phenomena, ghosts, apparitions and nightmares. Pisces people can fight by embodying the vast paranormal monster that is Mr. Stay Puft and transforming their dog into a fearless Ghostbuster. Who will you call?
You can find the dog costume here and the human inflatable horror show here.
Astrologer Reda Wigle researches and reports candidly on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. Her horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture and personal experience. To book a reading, visit her website.
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Image Source : nypost.com